Keep Your Old Love Letters. Throw Away Your Old Bank Statements.

If I could offer you one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind, You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded but trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your like. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know, still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: prices with rise - politicians will philander - you too will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one will run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

~Mary Schmich
Chicago Tribune

Things I Wonder

We all do it..

We all push away or with draw away from our friends when we end up finding someone that we really like, connect with, love or someone that we'd like to get to know better...

We want to get closer to that person and spend as much time with them as we possibly can... but why is it we withdraw from others?

It always makes me wonder... I'm not saying that I don't do it but that I notice it ... :)

after the night when i wake up i'll see what tomorrow brings

Beggin, beggin you... Put your loving hand out baby

I was asked out on a date.

alright wait let me start that again...

I'm on a few different networking sites... it's like people watching without actually having to get involved and those you're watching can't really see that you're watching... except on myYearbook.com

They have it so that you can actually see who has been to see your profile... little creepy sometimes... especially when you see some of the people that are checking you out.

One thing that has always fascinated me were the fact that human beings when sitting behind a computer start to lose their humanity... we lose our manners (if we ever had them) and we say shit to other people that would have had our parents beating the shit out of us, our grandparents rolling in the graves and wanting to come after us with wooden utensils... we say some of the most blunt, hurtful and seriously crude things to each other... if we don't like someone or the way they look we don't give them a second glance... if we think they're cute or handsome or something akin to that we (I'm lumping us all together in a collective WE) say some of the most crass and crude things...

I've had more complete strangers on the internet ask me about the most intimate things that happen in my bedroom then any of my friends ever have. They've asked me about my breast size, they've commented on how fat I am, how ugly I am and what my mom must look like and so on.

Why is it that we sit at our desks or on our couches and think that the words that are typed on the screen won't effect the person on the other side?

I don't just mean negatively either... I don't know about anyone else out there and I generally speak on my experiences or those that have been told to me... and it's not gender specific either... women are just as cruel as men and vice versa...

The words we type are just as hurtful, powerful and emotion triggering as those that we say out loud.

So it's interesting, gobsmacking, flabbergasting and incredible to watch people just shit on people over the webs... to see how cruel people can be when they're not held accountable...

I know you're probably wondering how in the hell we went from "I got asked out.." to this but don't worry you know me I'm full of hot air... so it'll take a few minutes...

So I generally get an inbox full of losers and assholes who send me a message, having never talked to me before or had any sort of conversation with them. Messages such as 'hw r u' <-- what the fuck is that? or 'How big are your titties there big mama?'

and various ways of asking that same question...

I don't even answer them anymore to tell them what assholes they are and I wish I knew their moms so that I could show them how disrespectful their sons are to women... it's a waste of my energy to do that over and over and over again in a day...

I give them a chance if they don't lead off with the drooling through text sound and seem like intelligent, respectful guys...

So I gave this guy, we'll call him Tom (ok like Krammit did, that is his actual name but seriously who cares), sends me a very nice respectful message saying hello, introducing himself, letting me know where abouts he's from and says he'd like to get to know me better.

So he and I correspond back and forth for a few days... by this time I've laid out the situation to him... told him about Big Daddy, told him about The Man... oh yeah the whole polyamory thing and how I'm not just cute but also a Mom... not hiding anything because generally it freaks them out and they never talk to me again. (on the flip side of that some of them then think I'm just around for sex and try to hit on me and fail miserably)

Not this guy... nope. He tells me that's fine and how he just wants to get to know me better and would even like one night to take me out and maybe have dinner and go to a movie. I tell him pretty much straight after that... that I'm not going to go out with him just so he can have sex with me. That's not what I do and that's not how this ... hmm how did Big Daddy put it... oh yeah... 'unorthodox' situation works... I'm not some whore or slut.

he says he's fine with that doesn't want me thinking it's for sex at all, he apparently just wants to get to know (and I quote) 'The most beautiful woman he's ever seen in his life' ... *blink blink* I really don't think he was looking at my pics...

Sooo... that brings us to tonight... I gave him my yahoo info and started talking to him away from myb and that's when it starts... sure it started off with regular conversation about how things are, how the weather is, what kind of movies do you like, favourite foods... and then... what are you wearing... do you like receiving oral... how big are your breasts... *sighs* and the like...

*shrugs* so ... I went from considering going on a date with this guy to not really thinking that's actually going to happen...

oh well... c'est la vie I suppose... now to go back to my people watching via the intertubes and letting the human race continue to shock me with their behaviours.

I'm not sure if the proper protocol is to wish people a 'Happy' Remembrance/Veterans day or not...

as it is I'm still really torn about how exactly I feel about the day at all... I know it's important to remember what happened and why this particular day... but I also know how I feel about wars in general...

It makes me want to absolutely cry when I see the shape of some of the soldiers when they come back nowadays... not that nowadays is any different then a hundred years ago... war just does really nasty things to people...

The men who have had to see it, witness it, take place in it... it breaks my heart and makes me cry to know... not even to know but to guess at what they've had to go through...

As I sit here and type this I'm thinking of just a couple of the things that Big Daddy told me and it makes me cry. (makes me miss him even more as well)

He left me with a piece of shrapnel that nearly got him while he was over seas... I look at it and think if it were just that much closer I would have never even gotten to meet him and I hate that thought.

Makes me also feel bad about yelling at him via a stupid email too the other day.

I hate war. I hate the political propaganda behind war. I hate what war does to the people who have to fight them. I know I probably sound like some sort of hippie or some shit but you know what... I'm human.

I miss you Big Daddy and I love you. And if no one else does today, I thank you for signing up to put yourself through that awful stuff.

Give me the money that has been spent in war and I will clothe every man, woman, and child in an attire of which kings and queens will be proud. I will build a schoolhouse in every valley over the whole earth. I will crown every hillside with a place of worship consecrated to peace. ~Charles Sumner


War does not determine who is right - only who is left. ~Bertrand Russell


It'll be a great day when education gets all the money it wants and the Air Force has to hold a bake sale to buy bombers. ~Author unknown, quoted in You Said a Mouthful edited by Ronald D. Fuchs


I dream of giving birth to a child who will ask, "Mother, what was war?" ~Eve Merriam


The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking... the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker. ~Albert Einstein


The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations. ~David Friedman


"There are no atheists in foxholes" isn't an argument against atheism, it's an argument against foxholes. ~James Morrow


Sometimes I think it should be a rule of war that you have to see somebody up close and get to know him before you can shoot him. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter

It's Cool if she's Powerful but way Better if she's Cute...

There's been a few times this past couple of weeks where I've thought to myself that I really need to sit down and type... and to just empty my brain... because as most who really know me know... if I don't it bugs me and will build until it just sort of explodes... which it did... last night... all over an email to Big Daddy... most of the stuff that has sort of irked me for the last couple of months just sort of needed to get out rather then being thinly veiled here, it was quite blunt... oh well... questions that have been wanting to be answered that probably still won't get answered...

There's have been a few things that have gone on or are going on...

The Boychild has been tested and it's been found out that even though he's a friggin genius he has a learning disability. So we had another meeting at the school to get him all set up with an educational plan... pretty much it says that if he needs help with something then he can go get help from the Resource Teacher... and then had another meeting last week this time with a Registered Nurse from the Ministry of Health who works with the Ministry of Education and we talked with her about getting him some Occupational Therapy for his fine motor control issues...

So he's on 'the list' for that... *nods* when he'll have an OT come talk to him...we have no idea could be even next year. Oh yay.

I got into a bit of an argument... I suppose it was an argument with nails... that wasn't fun. I just started questioning why it is when it's voting time is it that everyone seems to pop up on voting day telling everyone that they've voted. It's a legit question... I didn't just see it with the Americans who voted like 2 or 3 weeks after us Canadians.. but also here at home. On people's Facebook status msgs, myYearbook, Twitter, Plurk... everywhere people logging on just to say 'I voted!'

Like seriously? are they expecting a medal of some sort?

Anyway... I compared the act of voting to the act of voiding ones bowels and some seem to take offense to that.

Unless they are seriously hindered or a child you never see someone saying 'I Pooped!' so what's it matter.

Then of course I went into another tangent elsewhere about people telling other people to vote.

The whole tangent was pretty much how Life is about choices and one of those choices until the government takes it away is the friggin right to vote so don't tell me to vote, if I want to I will but not because I was coerced to by peer pressure. As a matter of fact I'm more likely to Not vote because people sit there and tell me to.

Then there were others that tried to say that people had no right to complain who was voted in if they don't vote... sure they do. I mean they'll look like uneducated imbeciles but they still have the right to complain. Everyone has the right to complain, if that's what they choose to do.

If I choose to blow up about the shit that's bothering me and complain in an email late at night, that's my choice. You'll find that applies to all aspects of life.

I hate when people use the excuse 'I had no choice' ... there is always a choice.

So before that I had been talking to Nark about how he seems to be MIA a lot lately... to which he responded with that he had been a really sucky friend and how even the person he had a crush on didn't even want to talk to him anymore and a bunch of other stuff... he seemed slightly surprised when I told him to get back to me when he wishes to be friends again.

It's generally during the dark times that I could use my friends and that seems to be when they're MIA... maybe that's just what I have to do is deal with the dark times by myself.

And I don't mean dark times as in getting all down and depressed. The dark times are from October 31 to December 21 of every year. It's where a lot of introspection is done.

hrm... maybe I subconsciously push people away... and then get upset when they're not there and apparently don't acknowledge those who are here... that's me... never happy I suppose.

must stop trying and just start doing...

There's more.. lots more... but I just don't feeling like typing it all right now.