But What's In A Dream...

Had a horrible dream this morning...though I have to admit it was really nice to sleep in as late as I did...
didn't get up until nearly 10 this morning...

the dream was something you'd see in a horror film or a video game or some such... it was Zuulie-Bear and myself and we were pretty much running for our lives from these weird zombie like dogs...who had this crazy green saliva and if it contacted human skin then the human would get all crazy and zombie like... and my brave (I was going to say little, but let's face it Zuulie is a big boy) Zuulie-Bear kept attacking the dogs and killing them by breaking the backs of their necks...and I would just keep running and running....and calling for him to come with me... he'd kill a couple and then he'd run to catch up to me...and we found this old warehouse and it had a tower type structure and we ran up the stairs closing the doors behind us as we went... and near the very top there was this security guard who wasn't infected and he helped hide us out in this little tiny hall that sort of went no where... but then the dogs got in and went to attack him....and Zuulie jumped out and took down this big dog and tore his throat out...but when he did the guard got splattered by some of the green saliva and started vomiting and convulsing but I couldn't get through the big steel door...I couldn't squeeze through to get out and so I was trapped there... and Zuulie kept whining because he wasn't sure what was going on with the guard...he tried to get me out of the spot by tugging on my clothes...but then the guard got up and started to come after Zuulie with his gun...and I was screaming No and the dog was whining...and then there was a gun shot...so I thought the guard had shot Zuul but it was that another guard came and shot the guard that was infected...but then he raised his gun to Zuulie because he thought that he was infected too and I stuck my arm through the door and was frantically crying out No that Zuulie was my dog and he wasn't infected and he was trying to save me...

Finally it clicked to the guy that I was trapped so he opened the heavy door and let me out and showed Zuulie and I how to get back down to the street...at least if we were running then we weren't trapped completely...

However we made a couple of wrong turns and we ended up in a dead end with a bunch of dogs coming at us...Zuulie-Bear stood between myself and the dogs and went after as many as he could but ...I jumped in and started snapping jaws (forcing them to open wider then they're meant to and snapping them) until I looked over and saw Zuulie laying on his side, crying as three dogs attacked him...I tried to go over and save him but knew that it was useless...I threw myself down beside Zuulie and as he lay there dying from his wounds the dogs attacked me and started eating me...

I woke up quite loudly so I have to say I'm quite glad that Bing was long gone to work before that dream happened.

Um...What?!

Wow. Um.
Shit got Real Today.

I'm not going to rehash it out here...even though I tend to share everything here on my blog...

Suffice it to say that something I never thought was ever going to happen...happened this morning...and made me want to fucking scream...was so pissed off... wanted to scream and beat the fuck out of someone... but instead I didn't get all reactionary...I realized what was going on...made a very adult decision and now am going to have a lot to do before I go away next month...

the timing was horrible...the happenstance was horrible...and I'll have to face more horrible before it's over...

*sigh*

went about the rest of my day... and what a long day it was...

went to an orientation thing for the Boychilds new school...then a tour of the college campus...then to the safety village...then lunch...then a bus ride to the new school...where we toured the school again...then picked up his new laptop and his uniform and all his school supplies...

then came home...picked up my swimsuit and the dog...then headed down to mum's for her annual BBQ where I just relaxed enjoyed myself...stopped worrying...had a nice dinner...

think the Zuulie-Bear enjoyed his time at grandma's house...he went swimming in the pool twice...ran around the pool many many times jumping over the diving board looking ever so much like a horse each time he did...

he came home fell fast asleep on the floor...not bad for a pup who started out his day in his crate for a few hours...

and now... I'm just taking a moment to breathe...and sort out how fucked up my next couple of weeks will be...

really? 5 a.m.?

well yesterdays mood didn't stay long... lasted until about 1pm but then again I had been up since 2 am... so... understandably so I was fading...

I must really be run down... I went to bed at 9pm... was so tired that in order to be able to watch the show I wanted to watch at 8pm I had to pace back and forth in the living room and not sit down for an hour...*shakes head*

so yeah went to bed at 9pm and was up this morning (because of the dog) at 5am... the Man had taken him outside but when they came back to bed Zuulie kept scratching at the door... so I got up and took him out... walked around the neighbourhood for over an hour... he still didn't pee... but I had tired him out... he's now fast asleep on the couch...

so now that everyone is back to sleep again for the next half an hour I'm thinking that I'm going to crawl into the shower and see if when I step out again if I'll maybe feel a bit more human...

might end up posting more later...I was just kind of bored... lol

and the top stories of the night are....(not listed below)

so not feeling well...

still wearing the heart monitor for the rest of this week... but been having sinus headaches...been stuffed up...haven't been hungry...and today I started coughing...

glad I have the monitor for the rest of the week... why? well because now I can take some meds for the sickness and if anything happens with my heart I can totally hit the button...

I have pushed the button on the monitor 5 times since I got the monitor... what happens is...I feel the wonkiness (yes that's a technical term) in my heart...I push the button and the monitor starts recording for the next minute...and then it says 'hey let's go ahead and record the 15 seconds before she pushed the button'...

it's been annoying trying to sleep with it on, and trying to keep comfortable while wearing it throughout the day... but now that I've had it for over a week... it's become a small friend... lol

sort of like when I was in hospital in Toronto and I was naming all of the medical equipment... my IV standy/rolly thing was Bernie... lol

I've not named the monitor but it's called a 'King of Hearts Express AF' so I just call it Kingy... lol

I was going to update about what's been going on but I've been a bit distracted last night and today I've been trying to find a ring of mine... it's making me sad that I haven't been able to find it... when sitting down and thinking when the last time I wore it was... was in Nevada... problem is.. after asking Big Daddy...he said he can't find it there...or hasn't seen it... *le sigh* I hope it turns up... I like that ring... it's my ring from Tiffany's...

can't seem to keep a thought it my head for more then a few moments...

oh... I haven't had a chance to really saying anything about my Zuulie-Bear (aka Zuul)... Nov 30th Burton proved once again just how freakin' awesome she is and gave me a ride out to Jordan and we went and picked up Zuul... a black labradoodle bull mastiff mix puppy... who for the last couple of months has been testing our patience... scratching us up... loving us up... and growing like a weed...

that's him the first night we got him... he was born on Oct 7 and like I said we picked him up on Nov 30th...so he was just shy of 8 weeks old... I think he was already bigger then Otis... (my sister's jack russell)...

and that's him on January 3rd after having just come in after a walk...don't mind the mess under the couch I hadn't swept yet... lol

He's going to be a big boy... his mum, the labradoodle, is about 75lbs and his dad, the bull mastiff, is about 90 lbs.. according to the lady I bought him from...hence why I call him Zullie-Bear... that and he doesn't have long hair but he doesn't really have short hair... his fur is quite strange... but thankfully he does have the poodle hair/dander so he's not bothering anyone's allergies...

I swear he's tripled in size from when we first got him... I'm going to try to take a pic of him every few weeks so I can see how much he's grown...

I've got to say I've really been enjoying Skyrim (on our new ps3) every time the Manchild is here I ask him to bring it with him... this last weekend he said we could keep it for the week... especially since he has exams this week that he's studying for...I've never found a game that holds my attention like Skyrim does...

But talking about the Manchild... the change in him has been really nice... since we/I found out what's really going on at his dad's place... Manchild has been much more open about what's going on with him... I've told him numerous times that he is welcome to move in here...and he's thinking that it would be best for him to do that at the end of this current school year... he despises all the people that he's having to live with at the moment... and is pretty much convinced that his father is a dick and a douchebag... I can't really say that I blame him much...I mean there are reasons I'm not with his father anymore... that's two of them right there...but in all seriousness... the Manchild doesn't tell his dad when something's bothering him, when he's injured, what's going on in his games, what's happening at school, or as far as I know even who the latest girl is that he has a crush on... and since his father has gotten a landline at the house the Manchild has been calling me on a fairly regular basis... heck I was on the phone with him for over an hour this morning... talking about his Business exam, sopa, skyrim, mw3, his friends and what his plans are for the rest of the week... this was just after spending the weekend with him... it's been really nice to see the turn around from a sullen teen with enough attitude for an entire platoon of teens...to someone who actually does seem to care about those around him...

I have a sneaking suspicion that his father has told him that I didn't want him...that I didn't want him living with me... I do know for a fact that he used to punish/discipline/keep the Manchild in line with using me as a threat... 'if you don't smarten up I'm going to send you to live with your mother' ...I was like wtf?? when I had heard that one...

After having talked with Manchild about what I would expect of him if he were to move here... he shrugged and said that he could live with that...and he never understood why his dad thought it would be so terrible for him here...hell it's like playland here compared to at his father's...

the only thing he doesn't like is the geography... location location location... right?
all his friends are in the same city as his dad...which would be nearly 30 mins to get here if they were to come and hang out... which would also mean having to change high-schools which I know would suck...but I still think he would be a lot happier here...

meh... we'll see...

in other news...

we've had one snow fall that really counted... and the snow only stayed for a little bit... other then that it's mostly been raining... *shrugs*

and in sports related news...

the Boychild had his first big karate tournament this past weekend on the 21st...my baby... he went into kata and kumite... I was so proud of him... the tournament he was in was my old clubs annual tournament... so it was the tournaments where I had won all my medals... some of the same sensei's were there...and the president of the federation is a family friend of ours and couldn't believe first off that the Boychild was mine but also that my mum was old enough to have a grandson competing...lol

so he was in a group of 8 or 9 kids (around the same age and belt colour) that were competing in the kata portion of the competition and Boychild didn't place... but we all (and I mean all - my mum, sis, Me, the Man, my dad, the Man's dad and the Man's step-monster) told him it was alright and that he'd do better next time... then it was a smaller group that were paired up for the kumite (aka sparring) portion... two white belts (the Boychild is a white belt) and two yellow belts...he was happy that he placed 3rd... but you could tell he was not really entirely impressed...I was congratulating him and he shrugged and responded with 'yeah but it's third out of four...' I just grinned and said that it at least wasn't fourth out of four and gave him a wink... we all gave him big hugs and told him that he was great and could only get better...

but talking about all of us who were there and why it was kind of a big deal is... my father is getting a divorce from his second wife...and he has recently (beginning of Dec) moved back to the area...and when I say back to the area I mean has moved and is now living in the same city as my mother... who is not very happy to hear that... she holds a grudge better then any Scorpio I know...(well as does my sister...but anyway)

so for the first time in nearly 12 years my Mum and Dad were in the same room...didn't speak nor stand near each other...but hey it's a step... I've told them all that all of them will be invited to stuff the kids have going on... if Manchild decides to go back into ball hockey...I'll let my Dad know when his games are and such... there's no reason that he should be left out of my children's lives just because it will make my mother and sister uncomfortable... in my opinion they both need to put on their big girl panties and suck it up...

I feel like it's taken me hours to type this post... and now I'm just so tired again... think I'll be going to bed early tonight...