I'm out of sorts this evening I think mainly because Gran died... well about 24 hrs ago.
But I don't think it's just that which has me sitting here wondering about things...
I've also been getting ideas that I"d like to do for this years Samhain... it'll be the first for the womens circle and I want to do a good one that will be remembered... but as I do the searches on ideas... I'm reminded that we'll be opening the door to the dark times...
The times were we reflect upon ourselves and do some heavy duty soul searching and take an introspective look at ourselves. It can be a tough time for some if not most. From Samhain to Yule... it's a time outside of a time... Samhain is our year end, new year's eve for all intents and purposes... Yule is our first day of the new year... the day the sun is born again. The time in between is considered the dark times. Generally I just try to hibernate a whole lot then. Easier to look at yourself when you're not conscience. *chuckles*
So as the Dark Times approach and the dealing with a family member passing on... I'm feeling not quite right tonight...
So tonight I went digging through my email, as I get some of the best emails... ones that make you laugh or cry or d'aww or some other mooshy emotion... there is one I go back to quite a bit... it's from my Bing... he sent me a beautifully personal email to me on Mother's Day... every time I read it, it just makes me want to hug him...
It made me smile a little tonight... I'd thank him for giving me such a precious gift but he'd probably wave it off or call me silly or some such...
I miss you terribly Bing and I can't wait til you come home.
I'm supposed to be in bed right now... you know since it is 5 am... *sighs*
I just don't see the point of laying in bed staring at the ceiling...
enh I'm jumbled again ...
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