Some Stuff...

What smilie are you? Take the test!

What animal are you? Take the test!

30 WAYS TO PISS SOMEONE OFF.


People You Know

1. When walking give them flat tires.
2. #1 every step.
3. Come by there house unexpectedly. Start singing.
4. Find their phone number and call. All the time
5. Start offering them food and when they finally except scream at them and tell them it was for "the guy next to them"
6. If their on a date walk up and hug them and thank them for such a great time last night.
7. Take them out to dinner. Order the most expensive thing. Make them pay the bill.
8. Tell them about your bowel movements
9. Pinch them.
10. #9 in the butt.
11. Offer them piggy back rides. All the time
12. Hand them a walkie talkie and start a conversation. Call them red leader.
13. #12 but when they don't say over start crying hysterically. When you stop say over calmly.

Strangers

14. Tell them how much you love him/her
15. Knock any bags out of their hands while screaming "FIRE!"
16. Walk up next to them and hold their hand
17. Kiss them good night in the middle of the day
18. Run up to them and ask them if they remember you from "bedwetters camp"
19. Walk up behind someone and pinch their fat and claim "someone's getting a little fat"

Your Spouse

20. Take them out to dinner and start staring at other men/women constantly.
21. Ask them about their day right when they start, without a word get up and go to the bathroom for half an hour.
22. Start watching "American Beauty" and ask your wife/husband "e why cant our relationship be like theirs"
23. In the middle of a conversation get up and call your best friend. Tell them how boring your conversation just was- loudly
24. Get up at 3:00 turn on the light as you leave the room
25. Put a ventriloquist doll that looks just like you at her/his office with a note saying "e so you know I'm watching your every move"
26. Sell their car
27. Spit in their food
28. Call them a different name all the time
29. Quote their least favorite actor.
30. Sign him/her up for an A.A. meeting, even if their not an alcoholic


11 Great things to say when people call your house

1. Say "Hello Chinese take out how may I take your order" in an Chinese accent
2. Say "What the " and hit a number bleeping a word out. Make this into a little conversation acting like you are cussing them out.
3. Start making a bunch of animal noises.
4. Make a message box voice and say" Hello we are unavailable to take your call right now please leave a message after the tone and make a beep noise.
5. Start talking in a foreign language.
6. Say " Yes my refrigerator is running from the Russians."
7. say "We have a dirty secret to tell you."
8. simply pas your gas into the phone and then say "hello"
9. If the time is midday say " Hello" in a drowsy tired voice
10. Say " Help me I'm being eaten by a giant squid.
11. If someone prank calls your house, never let them get off the phone by starting up along endless conversation.


10 Reasons To Go To Work Naked - actually 11 but...

1. Your boss is always yelling, "I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!"
2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan...
3. Inventive way to finally meet that hunk in Human Resources...
4. "I'd love to chip in, but I left my wallet in my pants."
5. To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse...
6. You want to see if it's like the dream...
7. So that-with a little help from Muzak-you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume...
8. People stop stealing your pens after they've seen where you keep them...
9. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk...
10. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning...
11. No one steals your chair...