I Wish It Would Rain...

One of the hardest things to say to someone is Goodbye.

goodbye [ˌgʊdˈbaɪ]

sentence substitute

farewell: a conventional expression used at leave-taking or parting with people and at the loss or rejection of things or ideas

n

1. a leave-taking; parting they prolonged their goodbyes for a few more minutes

2. a farewell they said goodbyes to each other

[contraction of God be with ye]

Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged © HarperCollins Publishers 1991, 1994, 1998, 2000, 2003

There's such a finality to the word goodbye.

It's one week... I'm not counting down happily to next Monday... but I know that it's coming and it's for the best... though it really doesn't make it any easier...

Truthfully I never would have thought that I would say bye to Bing...like ever... he's become the one person that I've been able to talk to about anything... ANY-THING...

He had become a big support in my life...holding my hand from afar when I needed someone to believe that I could do whatever it is that I needed to do...or go through...

From telling me that he believed in me when I was setting up for my first show for the business...to telling me not to let it discourage me when I didn't sell anything that day...

To telling me that 'this too shall pass' when I was so dark about breaking my ankle...letting me cry a bit on his shoulder so to speak when I get dark and down...

Talking me through my heartache when the Manchild was being a teenager and causing me to pull my hair out...

It's been four years of a very interesting, fun and really cool friendship...like all relationships there have been ups and downs...all types of relationships go through rough times and good times...

He has always been one of the first ones to tell me he's proud of me with getting healthy and losing my weight...when I hit my ideal weight finally it'll be hard to not send him a message in celebration...

It's going to take some time getting used to not sending him messages about all sorts of stuff or asking him what he thinks of stuff...

While here, I'm trying really hard to not dwell on the fact that I'm never going to see him again. I'm trying really hard to just be in the now and enjoy the few days that we have left together.
I just need to keep reminding myself of that so I don't let these few days pass me by without getting to fully enjoy them.

Especially when I'll have a 7 hour plane ride home to dwell all I want by myself.